Monday, August 25, 2008

top 10 things not to say to a pregnant woman...

1. Ooh. Don't stand on that (or reach for that... or eat that... or whatever...)!
Don't get me wrong, I understand the heart-felt concern behind this comment. But it's totally ridiculous that being pregnant means that people are allowed to completely disregard your age and treat you like a 5 year old again. It's a strange, surreal thing.

2. Should you be carrying her [your toddler]?
I love this one. I never quite know what to say in response. I'm usually torn between one of two sarcastic comments:

"Probably not, but I just love it so much that I can't help myself! Lugging an extra 22 lbs around in the scorching heat while struggling to catch my breath really rocks."
"Gosh, you're right. I shouldn't. Here... 'Lemme just put her down and let her meander through the parking lot by herself."

Instead I just laugh uncomfortably, and say something apologetic like, "Well... she's still pretty tiny."

3. How much weight have you gained?
How does growing a child inside of you make it OK for someone to know your weight?
Good Gravy.

4. I only gained ___ during my pregnancies.
OK, now that's just meanie, mean, mean, mean.

5. Your face is looking fuller.
Oh... This one.
This one is that it's been said to me during BOTH of my pregnancies. The thing is, the people who said it to me are genuinely warm, loving, people... a fact which leaves me totally stumped.

It's my understanding that having a fat face isn't such a good thing. I mean, I could be wrong here, but that really doesn't feel like a complement. At all.

6. Huh. I thought pregnancy cleared your skin up...
You might as well say, "Whoa! Pizza Face! What happened to you?"

7. I can't even tell you're pregnant!
Awesome. So I just look fat. Nice.

8. Ooh.. having two little ones close together. That's going to be a challenge.
Hmm... This one. What can you say in response to this one? I typically just smile and die a little inside.

9. When I was pregnant __________.
This is when Commenter proceeds to fill in the blank with a horrible pregnancy story...a story full of blood, guts, and other nightmarish things.
Totally appropriate...Because hormonally-challenged women never worry about anything.

10. You haven't had that baby yet?
This one is particularly sad when you are a million months along, swollen, and not getting any sleep.
This comment makes a pregnant woman want to go home and eat a gallon of Ben and Jerry's. Maybe 2.


Jackie @ Our Moments Our Memories said...

Goodness gracious. Some people have no tact whatsoever. I felt bad enough about #3 without anyone asking me about...I mean, come on!!!

Anyway, I am so excited for you and can't wait to "see" your sweet little guy. 93 days! :)

Martin Family said...

AMEN SISTER!!! People have said the craziest things to me. At every family dinner, my father-in-law likes to discuss in front of everyone how much I weigh and how much I have gained. When did this ever become acceptable? I usually just sit and smile and say could you pass the mashed potatoes. I need seconds..:)

Abbie Johnson said...

I completely agree with #2 and #8. if they ARE close together, yes you HAVE to carry the other one around. what choice do you have? When I was working the nursery desk and preggo with E and again with L, people wouldn't want to hand their kids to me, like I shouldn't be lifting them. Hello, my other child is 25+ pounds, I think I can handle it! :)

jen said...

I thought it was a round face? LOL

jennifer said...

Oh! Pardon me!!!

It WAS "round face". That's soooo much better! I totally misinterpreted that!


Mommy of Tyler and Chase said...

You are hilarious! I love reading your day I will write more than just posting pics:) I agree with your top 10! I was quite hefty with both boys...I got lots of great comments! You look beautiful by the way!!! Colin

jennifer said...

OH, Colin. I love you! You get major friend points for that comment!!!

Kris J. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kris J. said...

those are good ones! but then there's mine today...

jen: avery is totally into admiring herself...
me: what, she's like her mama?

but i did let you borrow my spoon at lunch. that must make up for it. ;)

maribeth said...

how many of those did i hear today as well! or my favorite recent comment-"oh, i didn't know you had 'popped' so much already?" umm, why yes, i am already enormous. thanks for sharing. seriously, people! there is not a single thing you can say to a pregnant woman that we cannot misconstrue, but sometimes we don't have to even try-it's just plain rude!

Kristen said...

Too too funny! I never understand people. They just don't think. I haven't seen you pregnant with this little guy, but you looked adorable when you were pregnant with Avery!

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