I cried today.
Two separate times.
Not just a little tender "misting of tears"... Oh nooooooo. That would be far too lady-like and NORMAL.
We're talkin' serious crying. The Snot-Runnin'-Mascara-Drippin'-Tammy-Faye-Shameless-Ugly-Face kind of crying.
It was nothing short of ridiculous.
If you've been pregnant before, you know that this hormonally-stimulated type of crying is the kind you can't just "shut off" at will. It likes to stick around for awhile. When it finally ends 30 minutes later, you'll find that you've not only cried about the silly thing that started the blubbering, but about everything sad that has ever happened in your life as well.
Pregnancy crying is guaranteed to happen over the most insignificant things and during the most inappropriate times...Inappropriate times like while you're shopping in the juice aisle at the grocery store, watching a random episode of The Gilmore Girls, or shopping for light fixtures in Lowes. It could even happen (hypothetically) while you are in a STINKING STAFF MEETING surrounded by your friends, boss, and colleagues.
People generally do one of two things in response to this highly inappropriate and unexpected behavior:
1. Give you understanding, sympathetic smiles and say things like, "oh honey".
This response, although very sweet, only serves to illicit more unwanted tears and snottage.
2. Give you a perplexed, confused look (You know, like just landed here from Mars. Or is it Venus? Who cares...).
I can't decide which response is more favorable.
The especially repugnant part of this obnoxious kind of "fluid leakage" is that there are NO warning signs that said leakage is about to occur. It just sneaks up on you and leaves you thinking in horror, "Oh no! Not now, not now, not now! Please, please, please!!!"
I've discovered that fighting it is useless. It can't be stopped and definitely "...won't be ignored, Dan".
The only thing to do?
That's what I did today. DURING A STINKIN' STAFF MEETING. Ugh.