rain, rain, come again...

Have I mentioned that I love vacation?
I do. I do. I do.
The only thing I love more than Vacation itself is Vacation Dave.

Vacation Dave is somewhat elusive during the year. He gets a little scared off by my roomie, Save Money Dave.
I've learned to appreciate Save Money Dave in recent months, but I've got a h-u-g-e crush on Vacation Dave.

Vacation Dave is so dreamy.
He never worries about money, budgets, or envelopes.
Vacation Dave doesn't mind shopping.
Vacation Dave says, "Sure" and "Of Course" when I ask, "Can I buy this?"
Vacation Dave never stresses because he enjoys all the benefits of Save Money Dave's year-long hard work and preparation.
He's a little bit of a mooch, but I'm not complaining.

I love him.
A lot.

Every year before we go on vacation, I pray for beautiful beach weather (no one wants to spend time on the beach in the rain)...but in my heart I also pray for just one rainy day.
Because Rainy Days are the perfect excuse for outlet shopping. With Vacation Dave.
Gap, Banana Republic, J.Crew... It's quite possibly the most romantic atmosphere on earth.

I'm not the only one in our family who loves Outlet Shopping Day. Avery loves it too.
She is unquestionably my daughter.



The day was a full one. We wore our little ones out.
This is what it looks like to shop till you... you know...


We woke them up for dinner at 4:45 to dine with the "early birds" and "blue hairs".
It's becoming clear that David and I are officially old.
Whatever. I'm fine with it.
Plus, all that shopping made me some kind of hungry.

Before dining on the yummiest appetizers ever, (fried crab claws and smoked tuna dip) I went to wash my hands in the restroom.
Look what we found on the wall...


Do you notice something horrifyingly familiar about those pictures?
You should.

Can you believe that those crazy fish tiles were massed produced?
What?!?

Avery actually noticed them first.
We walked in the restroom and she said, "Look! Just like our bathtub!"
It took me a second to understand what she was talking about, but once I did I burst out laughing and said, "Oh my goodness! You're right! That is hilarious! You are too smart!"

Then I pulled out the camera.
In the bathroom.
The mark of a true Blogger.

At the end of the day, we relaxed at the condo before heading to bed.
Wait - some of us relaxed while I read 843 books to some very cute and convincing kiddos.

Vacation Dave stopped to take a picture, but not to rescue me.
Good times.
I think I can forgive him since I'm now the proud new owner of several fabulous J.Crew t-shirts and a Banana Republic tunic top.

Oh -- one more thing...
Look what we saw on our drive to the outlet mall:

hee, hee...
Wouldn't you love to have heard the conversation that lead to that specification?

not even skeered.

FYI: The following post is proof positive that I'm not in any way afraid of the Swine Flu. In fact, I'm quite possibly laughing in Swine Flu's face...taunting it to "Come and get me".

For the past 3 years, our friends The Malahy's have been our beach vacation buddies.

Josh Malahy is a wedding photographer. This year, he had a wedding to shoot on Sunday in a nearby town - which meant that he would be gone during the first couple of nights of our trip. His one request was that we wouldn't eat dinner anywhere exciting while he was gone.

In keeping with our promise to Josh, we opted to head out to a Mexican restaurant for dinner on Sunday night.
The main thought being that Mexican would be a cheap, fast, no-fuss dinner.
Cheap? sure.
Fast? not so much
No-Fuss? you be the judge.

Between the Malahy family and ours, the dining party that evening was made up of:
3 adults
2 infants
and 3 little angels (look at those faces!)

The hostess took one look at the gazillion kids we had with us and muttered to the other hostess, "Put them in the back."

Nice.

Evidently, "the back" is where they banish the unacceptable guests.
The ones who don't care about things like clean dishes

or chairs that are --- not broken.

How long did the person sitting in this booth have to wait for their dinner to make this hole in the mini blinds?
Just wondering...

The fantastic atmosphere in the "back room" was, to at least one family, the perfect place to have a 14-year-old birthday party.

Evidently, the birthday girl had lots of chocolate cake left over, so her mother offered the rest of the cake to us.
BEFORE our meal came.

Gee. Thanks, lady.

Avery almost lost her stinkin' mind when we told her that she would have to wait until after she ate her food to have the cake.
Things got a little ugly.

Chocolate Cake Lady was feeling super generous that evening. Just about everyone in the restaurant had a piece of that cake.
Including the waiter.

Yep. That's the waiter you see there sitting down chowin' away on some b'day cake.

Nothing but the best while we're on vacation, people.
High class all the way.

After eating 2.4 bites of their food...the kids dove into the chocolate cake with gusto.

Avery and Miller decided to bypass the whole plate thing (good thing, because they were dirty anyway) and eat the icing directly off of the cake.


As a result, total sugar overload occurred shortly thereafter, causing complete and utter chaos.

Here's Miller putting a fork in my diaper bag.
You know, for later.

And here's Avery and Carter screaming and running around the "back room" while we waited AN ETERNITY for our check.

I wonder why they thought they should put us in the back.

More adventures to come.
We'll be here till Saturday...

the joy is in the journey?

Can anyone tell me why preparing for vacation is just about the most stressful thing on the planet?

All the clothes washing and folding, the searching for swimmies and digging out of sand buckets...
It's gotta take a few years off of your life.
It's horrible.

As stressful as all that packing is, I have to say that it absolutely pales in comparison to the stress of a 452 hour Car Ride O' Doom with a toddler and infant.Ya'll gonna make me lose my mind up in here.

All car rides start out the same way: with everyone happy, excited, and ready to go. A rookie parent might be fooled into thinking that this blissful experience will last for longer than the first hour of the trip.

Oh foolish, foolish newbie.
You're lucky if it lasts to the end of the street.

The fact is, the short-lived "calm before the storm" is just a terrible, cruel joke of nature.
El Avery-o is a storm that few survive.
Preparation is KEY.

Thankfully, our drive to Florida wasn't our first one.
We've already payed our "stupid tax"(as the lovely Dave Ramsey would say) in that department.

This Mommy's got skills. And a little "bag of tricks" loaded with books, markers, crayons, cookies, and lots of coloring books.
If bribery and begging were tangible items, they would be in there too.

We waited to pull out the "big guns" (a.k.a. DVD player and strawberry gum) until things got really challenging.
The combination can only lead to Toddler Bliss.
Trust me.
It's powerful stuff.

Diego normally makes me want to stab my eyeballs out, but after hour six in the car with a 2 1/2 year old and an infant, he is the most beautiful sound on earth.

Second only to complete silence, of course.

So - after what can only be described as the longest car ride in the history of man, we arrived at our condo.

I'm surprised that the neighbors didn't call the cops on us for ramming carts and dragging screaming babies down the hallway at 4:30 am.

We slept for a few hours of sleep and then ventured out to the beach.




Last year, Avery was horrified by the sand.
She wouldn't even put her feet down in it, but look at her this year...
What a difference a year makes.

I love vacation.
Love it.
And We don't have to drive back home for 4 more days...

freakin out

So am I the only person in America NOT worried about The Swine Flu?

I'm starting to think maybe I should join in the hysteria.

It's all over the media: radio, news, papers, magazines.
It's weaseled it's way into blog posts and wriggled into a Facebook Status or two.

Even the stone-faced librarian that checked us out today had it on the brain.

This is the book I innocently checked out for Avery.

Upon reading the title, Librarian Lady said, "How appropriate given what's going on in the world."

What the what?!?
Lady, it's just a cute kid's book.
*Sigh*

So - here's the deal: I'm making a stand.
I'm refusing to buy into the hype.

I won't be bullied into fear by news anchors and journalists.
I will not allow myself to worry about the economy.
I will not stress about the value of my house or my 401K.
I will not spread messages of doom and gloom.
I won't be fearful of my kid getting Autism from vaccines.
I will not worry that my burger contains Mad Cow Disease.
I will not rush to buy a face mask at Walgreens when someone sneezes in my direction.
I won't carry around a backpack filled with water bottles and dehydrated food.
I won't hide my kids in an underground bunker.
I will not obsess over the the Bird Flu, Pig Flu, or any other kind of Flu.
I won't worry that every bee is a Killer Bee.
I will not worry.
I will NOT be afraid.
I just won't.

Instead --
I will save money, not hoard it.
I will give money generously, and not worry about how I'm going to get more.
I will play in the yard with my kids.
I will pray for my President instead of trashing him.
I will shake hands with people fearlessly.

AND while I'm at it--
I will go on vacation with my family.
I will enjoy the sunny weather and the sand in my toes.
I will love on my babies. and cover them with kisses.
and sunblock.
I won't worry about UV rays. Or skin cancer. Or even wrinkles.
I'll even try to not worry about the fish swimmin' around in the water I'm wading in.
That's how serious I am, people.

The good news is that the sky isn't going to fall today, but if it does, I know the creator of the sky.
He's got everything under control.
I'm so glad.
So, so, glad.

Matthew 6:30-33 (The Message)
"If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don't you think he'll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.

Philippians 4:6-7 (The Message)
Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

Psalm 46:1-3 (The Message)
God is a safe place to hide, ready to help when we need him.
We stand fearless at the cliff-edge of doom,
courageous in seastorm and earthquake,
Before the rush and roar of oceans,
the tremors that shift mountains.
Jacob-wrestling God fights for us,
God-of-Angel-Armies protects us.

Isaiah 41:8-10 (The Message)
"But you, Israel, are my servant.
You're Jacob, my first choice, descendants of my good friend Abraham.
I pulled you in from all over the world,
called you in from every dark corner of the earth,
Telling you, 'You're my servant, serving on my side.
I've picked you. I haven't dropped you.'
Don't panic. I'm with you.
There's no need to fear for I'm your God.
I'll give you strength. I'll help you.
I'll hold you steady, keep a firm grip on you.

almost wordless wednesday

Me: Hey Dave, will you hand me the camera?
David: Everything's a blog post to you, Tillman.
Me: yep.
_____________________________


How to give your kids Typhoid:
or
Swine Flu Soup, Anyone?:
or
Somebody Call Hazmat:

That's all I've got.



I just realized that this post doesn't even kind of resemble a Wordless Wednesday post. Not even an ALMOST Wordless Wednesday Post.

*edited to add*
I should probably say that this picture was taken BEFORE I dumped the water. and the sand. ewww.

CUTER than pushkin

Do 'ya think I watch too much Gilmore Girls?
Wait until after you watch the video to tell me your answer.


Keep in mind that the only reason I had to prompt her is because she likes to make me look like an absolute liar.

I promise you she's been walking around singing that song non-stop for at least 3 weeks now.
While taking a bath...
While in the deodorant aisle at Target...
While on the potty...
While playing with her dolls...
Non-Stop.
Seriously.

It's more than a little unfair that the moment I stop to document the cuteness, she makes me look like one of those creepy Pageant Mommies on "Toddlers and Tiaras".

I'm SO not like one of those mommies.
We only went over the hand motions to the song for a couple of hours after I cut off the camera.

Side note:
Have you SEEN that show? You must. If for no other reason than to make yourself feel like Mom of the Year.

Side Note to the Side Note:
Now you see why I will NEVER sing with David. At least, not in front of a mic. Trust me, I'm not delusional about these pipes OR the lack thereof.

somebody's teething

Every outfit little Charlie wears looks just like that these days.

I'm too obsessed with his cute little bitty clothes to cover them with bibs, so I end up changing him a zillion times a day.
Yet another example of how I always manage to do things the hard way.


Look at those bubbles.
Absolutely spectacular.

214 reasons to floss

2
number of children I've had since my last trip to the dentist

0
number of dental insurance policies that we own.

2
x-rays I should have refused to get

1
scary drill

1
jab in the gums

2
questions asked while someone's hands were in my mouth.

3
times I clenched my fists in pain.

3
cavities discovered.

214
dollars spent

1
near anurysm that I had when we forked over the $214 for the bill.

4
pairs of shoes that I COULD have bought for $214.

2
hours spent doing something terribly UN-fun

1
lousy toothbrush

1
mini toothpaste

1
container of dental floss


0
fun toys, plastic rings, or suckers. because being a grown-up STINKS.

Just in case you ever wondered what a $214 tooth cleaning looks like:

Lovely, huh?
At least the toothbrush was pink. That's something.

baby gift

Our youth pastor and his wife just had a sweet little baby boy this week.

Evidently, our church is in the Baby Making Business. There have been over 20 births in the last year or so.
That's a bunch of friends for little Charlie to play with!

We're just stimulating the economy through Doctor's bills and diaper purchases. You know, doing our part...one kid at a time.

Anyway - I made a little banner and thought I'd show 'ya what it looks like. Baby Dutch's room is brown and blue, so I stuck with that theme.

I love my Cricut.
Love it.
Want to marry it.

Is that weird?

an attempt.

I just wanted one picture.

One.

So - I kept on trying...

in hopes that they would randomly BOTH look at the camera at the same time.

There are like 80 shots just like these.

Ummm...definitely not working.

Maybe another time.

By the way - you may notice how HUGE Charlie looks sitting next to Avery. That's because he weighs 16 pounds now.
16.

(Just about all 16 of those pounds are located right in those big 'ol chunky thighs!)

Avery weighs 21 pounds.

They are already wearing the same size diapers. Isn't that a hoot?! My Big Boy looooves to eat.